So this morning, I am sitting in on a Bible class that is taking place in my classroom; and during the teaching, I hear, "Don't trade God's best for what you want in life." And then I hear the Lord say, "aren't you glad you didn't trade what I wanted for you, for what you wanted for yourself"? WOW! I am just sitting here, nearly in tears at my desk, in front of all these students. The Lord has been so good to me...
When the economy took a turn for the worst, like everyone else, it affected me and my family also. I lost my job during this time. Prior to that, my husband and I bought the home that we live in today, and we were really doing well financially. I enjoyed my job, I was the branch manager of a global company and I was making business deals that turned profit ... things were good. When this job ended, I wasn't sure what was next. Being a go-getter, I started my own business providing consulting services and things went well. I was somewhat content. But then, during a time of prayer, the Lord spoke to me and said, "I am doing something in you and what I need to do, can not be blocked by money, status, or power"! I will not give you another job that allows those things ... WHAT! So here I am, full of pride, ignoring what he said, because, I had convinced myself; I am a strong, educated woman, and I DESERVE to live good. This is what I wanted for my life. The corporate life, the money, the title. And while those things felt good to me, they were hindering my relationship with the Lord.
So, here I am. Now on my 3rd child, and depression has rented a space in my life. What good was going to come of my life if I wasn't working and making good money? These were my thoughts. I was envious of other women who seemed to be flowing in their element and living well. My thoughts and emotions were all over the place. My husband was okay with me being a stay-at-home mom. I had shifted into this role for a moment during our 2nd child and I enjoyed being able to nurse and be home with my children during the early stages of their life. But, I always kept in the back of my mind how I was going to get back what I lost. After having baby No. 3, my thoughts and priorities started to shift. The Lord had really started to do a work in me, and I was vulnerable to HIM.
The opportunity for me to teach and teach at my kid's school presented itself. I like the fact that I could be with my kids during the day and go spend time with my boys during their recess hour. And being my daughter's teacher was really interesting ... REALLY :) I settled in and accepted the fact that this is was what the Lord wanted for me. I had no idea, what was ahead! Here I am, working a job that comes with a pay that I had never earned a day in my life, a very low pay, and I am LOVING IT! I'm waking up in the mornings not complaining about going to work (like I did with all of my other jobs that paid well). Excited to go back the next day and the next day. Working overtime and not caring that there is no overtime pay, enjoying time with my kids, eating lunch with them. I came home one day and told my husband, "this is the best job I have ever had in my LIFE!" And then, the Lord starts to allow me to use my gifts. Now, I am impacting the lives of students and their parents, and HE is getting all the Glory. You see, I thought, I had to have a certain title, maintain a certain status to have influence ... God's ways are not our ways! I am flowing in my element. And today, HE gets the Glory for it.
But wait, because, I am not done! Not only do I go to a job everyday that has purpose; but, because of what HE has done in my life, and is continuing to do. I am also flowing in my ministry purpose. As I just ministered at a women's conference a couple of weeks ago, and HE continues to put me on public platforms to speak. I have always been a speaker, the Lord has gifted me that ability. And speaking engagements would present themselves from time to time, and they would have an impact. Even then, the Lord would use me. I actually think, he was giving me a taste of what was to come. But, if could be real and honest. Speaking today, is not like speaking back then. Today, lives are being changed through the Lord's message and not my own. Today, the Lord gets the credit and NOT ME. Today, I am a whole person, and not broken and bitter speaking through a facade.
You see, I was ready to trade God's best for my life. My best, was packaged in pride. I couldn't see the best in being a stay-at-home mom, and then taking a job where I would be with my kids all day. I couldn't see the best in loosing 10's of thousands of dollars in a paycheck, I couldn't see the best, in surrendering my life to the Lord, but, today ... I HAVE THE BEST!
I want to encourage you, don't trade God's best for what you want. What you want, will never be sufficient. I worked the job that paid well and gave me status and a title. And I was miserable! I spent all my time hanging with friends and having fun with them, and my family was miserable! I paid my bills, and blew the money I had left over, and didn't think about sustaining a future! I didn't have the best, I had a superficial lifestyle that left me empty. Go back to the first thing that the Lord told you, I can promise you, in that, is HIS best for you.
Remember, surrender all ...
Tynisha
When the economy took a turn for the worst, like everyone else, it affected me and my family also. I lost my job during this time. Prior to that, my husband and I bought the home that we live in today, and we were really doing well financially. I enjoyed my job, I was the branch manager of a global company and I was making business deals that turned profit ... things were good. When this job ended, I wasn't sure what was next. Being a go-getter, I started my own business providing consulting services and things went well. I was somewhat content. But then, during a time of prayer, the Lord spoke to me and said, "I am doing something in you and what I need to do, can not be blocked by money, status, or power"! I will not give you another job that allows those things ... WHAT! So here I am, full of pride, ignoring what he said, because, I had convinced myself; I am a strong, educated woman, and I DESERVE to live good. This is what I wanted for my life. The corporate life, the money, the title. And while those things felt good to me, they were hindering my relationship with the Lord.
So, here I am. Now on my 3rd child, and depression has rented a space in my life. What good was going to come of my life if I wasn't working and making good money? These were my thoughts. I was envious of other women who seemed to be flowing in their element and living well. My thoughts and emotions were all over the place. My husband was okay with me being a stay-at-home mom. I had shifted into this role for a moment during our 2nd child and I enjoyed being able to nurse and be home with my children during the early stages of their life. But, I always kept in the back of my mind how I was going to get back what I lost. After having baby No. 3, my thoughts and priorities started to shift. The Lord had really started to do a work in me, and I was vulnerable to HIM.
The opportunity for me to teach and teach at my kid's school presented itself. I like the fact that I could be with my kids during the day and go spend time with my boys during their recess hour. And being my daughter's teacher was really interesting ... REALLY :) I settled in and accepted the fact that this is was what the Lord wanted for me. I had no idea, what was ahead! Here I am, working a job that comes with a pay that I had never earned a day in my life, a very low pay, and I am LOVING IT! I'm waking up in the mornings not complaining about going to work (like I did with all of my other jobs that paid well). Excited to go back the next day and the next day. Working overtime and not caring that there is no overtime pay, enjoying time with my kids, eating lunch with them. I came home one day and told my husband, "this is the best job I have ever had in my LIFE!" And then, the Lord starts to allow me to use my gifts. Now, I am impacting the lives of students and their parents, and HE is getting all the Glory. You see, I thought, I had to have a certain title, maintain a certain status to have influence ... God's ways are not our ways! I am flowing in my element. And today, HE gets the Glory for it.
But wait, because, I am not done! Not only do I go to a job everyday that has purpose; but, because of what HE has done in my life, and is continuing to do. I am also flowing in my ministry purpose. As I just ministered at a women's conference a couple of weeks ago, and HE continues to put me on public platforms to speak. I have always been a speaker, the Lord has gifted me that ability. And speaking engagements would present themselves from time to time, and they would have an impact. Even then, the Lord would use me. I actually think, he was giving me a taste of what was to come. But, if could be real and honest. Speaking today, is not like speaking back then. Today, lives are being changed through the Lord's message and not my own. Today, the Lord gets the credit and NOT ME. Today, I am a whole person, and not broken and bitter speaking through a facade.
You see, I was ready to trade God's best for my life. My best, was packaged in pride. I couldn't see the best in being a stay-at-home mom, and then taking a job where I would be with my kids all day. I couldn't see the best in loosing 10's of thousands of dollars in a paycheck, I couldn't see the best, in surrendering my life to the Lord, but, today ... I HAVE THE BEST!
I want to encourage you, don't trade God's best for what you want. What you want, will never be sufficient. I worked the job that paid well and gave me status and a title. And I was miserable! I spent all my time hanging with friends and having fun with them, and my family was miserable! I paid my bills, and blew the money I had left over, and didn't think about sustaining a future! I didn't have the best, I had a superficial lifestyle that left me empty. Go back to the first thing that the Lord told you, I can promise you, in that, is HIS best for you.
Remember, surrender all ...
Tynisha
That is so good Tynisha,
ReplyDeleteI traded Gods best for what I wanted for many, many years. I worked hard and climbed MY WAY to the top! I had a career, title, money, and happiness, so I thought. However, going through revival helped me realize that although I had the material "success" I had become a compromiser, a liar, a cheat, double minded and a host of other things that were not pleasing in the sight of the Lord. As a result, I left all that I had ever known in search of what God had planned for my life. Does it hurt sometimes not being able to do what I want to do when I want to and having what I want when I want it? Yeah, I would be lying if I said that I ALWAYS embrace the struggle of being on a budget. However, would I trade what I have now (peace of mind, spiritual freedom, walking in Gods purpose) to gain “societal success” again.. NEVER! Today, I accept the kingdom dream and I am learning to be content with the portion that GOD has for me!
Michelle, this is awesome! I am encouraged by your decision to leave everything and chase after God. Keep pressing forward.
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