Stop the Madness

Last night I found myself getting frustrated because I feel like I can't maintain the type of consistency in my life that allows for things to be balanced; I start something, stay on task with it for awhile (then life shifts) and it gets tossed to the waist-side.  I have this ideal-world created in my mind that everyday is going to start of great and balanced ... yeah right! In a fantasy world maybe, in my world, it's not happening.  Much of my frustration was coming from the fact that I feel like I have all these things that I want to do (and can never get to them); start back on my exercise regiment, complete small projects around the house, heck! go to the grocery store, set aside some "me" time, catch up on the 50 episodes of General Hospital that I have saved in my DVR and spend time with the Lord.  Out of all of these things; it's my time with the Lord that I want the most. I get on a daily devotion and prayer regiment and then I get off.  Then I find myself pushing into His presence with everything has come to a head and now I need to be strengthen or encouraged.  I don't want that kind of relationship with the Lord, He deserves more (He has done too much for me). I don't even need to talk about how my time for other things seem to be minimal to none and my time that I need and want with the Lord can be non-existent.  Somehow, I have convinced myself into thinking that there will be a day when life is not cluttered, it's simple and I will have uninterrupted time with the Lord.  For a working wife and mother, that doesn't exist.  Even if your not married and don't have kids, life is busy.  So going to bed discouraged last night; I am thankful this morning, that I am encouraged and motivated to maneuver through the clutter.

My daily devotion today was a pearl in the rough for me.  It showed me how I have made my list-to-dos an idol directing my life. I have more calendars and schedules one can think of. Mentally, I am always telling myself, "if I can clear up the clutter, I can communion more with God .... Help Me Lord!" After reading my devotion, I recognized something ... God is not where He should be in my life.  Life may not be simple, but a relationship with the Lord is; I don't have to send him a text and wait for a response, leave him a message and wait for a call back, He is readily available; and I was reminded of that today.  He desires to stay in touch with me and communicate with me throughout the day.  I talk with my husband through out the day while at work; whether it's by phone or text, 5 minutes or 15 minutes. Why not have that same time with God.  I also recognized that my goal setting is off; I'm trying to fix and control everything.  But, if I were more focused on the Lord, these things wouldn't control the flow of my day and suck up all of my attention. The balance will come when I align the things in my life up with the Lord.  Sometimes I feel that if I can't be on bended-knee before the Lord or in a room with praise and worship music on, in prayer for hours; I'm not engaging the Lord properly.  But I was reminded that, it doesn't always take that.  If I just accept each day as it comes, talk with the Lord about my feelings and the pressures of the day, tell Him how grateful I am to have him in my life, trust Him for the day; I have met the most important goal ... spending time with Him.

So I want to encourage us all today.  Let's not focus on the madness; that will stop once we have connected with the Lord.  The Holy Spirit is our tour guide and He will direct us moment-by-moment.  It's okay to write out our list of things to do, but let it not take the place of the Lord in our lives.  And for our daily goals, let them be to just find the Lord in the midst of it all; in the chaos, in the clutter, in the busyness; and He will make life simple.  Even if we only completed one task, but talked with the Lord, cleaned the kitchen and not the bathroom, but referenced the Lord, washed the laundry but didn't get the opportunity fold it, but got in prayer, prepared lunches and maybe had to order take-out for dinner, but communion with the Lord ... we have had a success day!

Remember, surrender all ...
Tynisha