This week has been declared "Father's Week." As we approach Father's Day; commercials, weekly sales ads and stores have been advertising what they feel is the perfect gift for our dads. I have been looking into crafty gift ideas for the kids to make, because I feel that, it is those gifts that say a thousand words and are priceless! At some point the kids and I will get together and come up with the best gift for dad and I will do my best to keep the day light and easy...at dad's request :)
As I get into this post, I want to recognize 3 men who have had an impact on my life in some fashion. First being my natural father. After 36 years, the Lord made a way for us to reconcile and make room for one another in our lives. And if you haven't done so already, I encourage you to read my previous post "A Father's Love" part 1&2, where I share openly about our journey of rejection, healing and reconciliation. A journey that led to God bringing a father and daughter together. Although my father was not active in my life until 6 months ago, father's day for him and I this year will be different. It will be the first time in 36 years that I will be able to pick the phone up, dial a working number for him, hear his voice on the other end and say "Happy Father's Day." Not because he was there from the beginning, or because he taught me how to ride my bike, came to my first track meet or bought my first car, but because, we both ceased the moment that God gave us and chose to forgive one another and ourselves and we are at a place of peace. I have forgiven my father and I have no expectations of him. Our relationship with each other is different and it is fitting for where we both are in life today. I also don't want to give an impression that I was without any presence of a physical father because I wasn't. I did have a step-dad in my life, that as an adult today, I wish my relationship with him would have been different and I really would have recognize at that time in my life who he was in my life and honored that. He was a good man and he raised my siblings and I the best way he knew how...thank you L.A. Burns!
As a child growing up, I would always wonder, what it was like to have a father, who shows you affection, teach you things, encourage you, admonish and discipline you with love, pray with you and you could always count on him to be there. I didn't have that, but, I'm so thankful that my children do. My husband is a picture frame of a God-fearing man, who was raised with good morals and values. He works hard, provides for our family, gives us his undivided attention, loves and cares for us. We are a blended family with my oldest daughter Halee not being my husband's biological child. When my husband and I first starting dating, his first intentions were to have a presence in my daughter's life and be a father to her (not just the guy who married her mom). He shut down all the nay-sayers who said "she's not your child,"she has a daddy." (that is a post for a different day!) My husband made every effort to love her and raise her like his own. In our 11 years of marriage, NEVER ONCE has he mistreated her, or tell me "that's your child", even though at times, I failed to make him a part of things. And when he would find his heart becoming bitter because of disappointing and hurtful situations, he would go before the Lord and ask him to help him forgive and continue to love us both. To her, he is father who has stayed up countless hours doing mind-blowing math problems, he's the one who helps her build award winning science projects that she would tell him she had to do at the last minute. Take her to breakfast on his only day off that he has had in months, bring her home her favorite snacks and dinner. Encourage me to keep trying at my relationship with her when I felt like there was no hope. He makes sure she has had the best; pays for private school tuition and expensive fees, he has taught her how to drive, encourages her in her faith and admonished and disciplined her for the sake of her life not falling into ruins. He compliments her and takes notice of her strength and he has always, always, always, always, loved her like his own.
For two boys who love adventures and super-heroes, they are blessed to wake up everything day to a real-live super-hero...their DAD. To our oldest son Mason, their father is "Optimus-Prime". He is the strong man that leads and protects our family and tells us auto-bots when to roll out :) The man that can fix and build anything. And like any hero who has compassion, he is the man that always shows them he loves them all. To our youngest son Milo, he is "Batman" the man who gets up in the middle of the night and pray with him when he has nightmares, the hero who makes all things better; the guy who when Milo's first fish died he was there to teach him about death and made sure he had another one, and he's the one that doesn't fear anything and made him feel safe when he rode his first roller coaster (at the age of 3) with him. To these two boys, their dad is the man that can build, fix, and conquer anything!!!
My view of Father's Day over the last few years have changed. I didn't always recognize and honor the man who has leading our family and raising our children. Much of my acknowledgement was focused on what he wasn't doing and where I thought he lacked. But during the process of the Lord moving in my life and saving our marriage, I started to see my husband through different lenses. I see the father who comes home after a long-hard day's work and teaches his son how to ride his first bike, plant a garden with the other son; teaching him how to care for things, I see the man who fixes, remodels and renovates anything at my request. The father who loves me and our daughter through our many MOOD SWINGS! The father who never complains about getting up in the morning and going to work whether it's rain or shine, snow or sleet. A father who loves without conditions.
When I look at my husband, and all that he has endured in his life; the passing of his own father at a time in his life he needed him the most, the hardship of our marriage and family and being a father to 3 kids, I am so blessed and encouraged by what the Lord has done and is continuing to do in our lives. You see, I am grateful to the Lord for all of the men that I have spoken about above. They have all had an impact in my life in some way. And through it all, the Lord gets the Glory. When I was the little girl, longing to know how it felt to be daddy's little girl, the Lord scooped me up and protected me. When my life was a total mess and I didn't know who I was; like any true father, he called me lovely and gave me my identity (it's never too late to find who you are in the Lord), when I was a single-mom praying that my daughter would not grow up with out a father and experience the rejection that I did, he sent my husband. And when our family was blended, "beautifully blended" as my daughter refers to it, the Lord has knit us together by the threads of His love. As this week has transition from one day to another, I have become emotional by the thoughts and memories of all that my heavenly father has done in my life. His love is my strength and His grace is sufficient to endure any hard times. When I didn't know Him and know that He was there, He was a father. When I gave up hope and turned away, He was a father. When I disappointed Him, He was a father. When I was without, He was a father. And when I was lost, He was a father. When I was broken, He was a father. When I couldn't trust and didn't know how to love, He was a father. When I didn't know what I needed, He was a father.
When we are born into this world and put on this earth, we are not given a say of who are parents and family will be. But we are giving the same opportunity...to come to know our HEAVENLY FATHER, through His son Jesus Christ. And with this opportunity there is; love, peace, joy, happiness, guidance to get through hard times, strength to endure any pain, and hope to get pass the disappointments. Whether your natural father is living or has passed away...reconcile! If you have discouraged instead of encouraged your husband...reconcile! If you have turned your back on God...reconcile! It was when I FIRST began to reconcile things with the Lord that He reconcile everything else in my life. I want to encourage you today and remind myself, though life may have not started the way we would have liked, it can still be lived and end with the ways of the Lord. Take a step today, ask the Lord to come into your heart and life and reconcile! Then take another step and forgive your natural father (maybe call Him or write a letter if he is deceased) and take an even bigger step and let our Lord and Savior be a father to you!!!
Remember, surrender all...
Tynisha
As a child growing up, I would always wonder, what it was like to have a father, who shows you affection, teach you things, encourage you, admonish and discipline you with love, pray with you and you could always count on him to be there. I didn't have that, but, I'm so thankful that my children do. My husband is a picture frame of a God-fearing man, who was raised with good morals and values. He works hard, provides for our family, gives us his undivided attention, loves and cares for us. We are a blended family with my oldest daughter Halee not being my husband's biological child. When my husband and I first starting dating, his first intentions were to have a presence in my daughter's life and be a father to her (not just the guy who married her mom). He shut down all the nay-sayers who said "she's not your child,"she has a daddy." (that is a post for a different day!) My husband made every effort to love her and raise her like his own. In our 11 years of marriage, NEVER ONCE has he mistreated her, or tell me "that's your child", even though at times, I failed to make him a part of things. And when he would find his heart becoming bitter because of disappointing and hurtful situations, he would go before the Lord and ask him to help him forgive and continue to love us both. To her, he is father who has stayed up countless hours doing mind-blowing math problems, he's the one who helps her build award winning science projects that she would tell him she had to do at the last minute. Take her to breakfast on his only day off that he has had in months, bring her home her favorite snacks and dinner. Encourage me to keep trying at my relationship with her when I felt like there was no hope. He makes sure she has had the best; pays for private school tuition and expensive fees, he has taught her how to drive, encourages her in her faith and admonished and disciplined her for the sake of her life not falling into ruins. He compliments her and takes notice of her strength and he has always, always, always, always, loved her like his own.
For two boys who love adventures and super-heroes, they are blessed to wake up everything day to a real-live super-hero...their DAD. To our oldest son Mason, their father is "Optimus-Prime". He is the strong man that leads and protects our family and tells us auto-bots when to roll out :) The man that can fix and build anything. And like any hero who has compassion, he is the man that always shows them he loves them all. To our youngest son Milo, he is "Batman" the man who gets up in the middle of the night and pray with him when he has nightmares, the hero who makes all things better; the guy who when Milo's first fish died he was there to teach him about death and made sure he had another one, and he's the one that doesn't fear anything and made him feel safe when he rode his first roller coaster (at the age of 3) with him. To these two boys, their dad is the man that can build, fix, and conquer anything!!!
My view of Father's Day over the last few years have changed. I didn't always recognize and honor the man who has leading our family and raising our children. Much of my acknowledgement was focused on what he wasn't doing and where I thought he lacked. But during the process of the Lord moving in my life and saving our marriage, I started to see my husband through different lenses. I see the father who comes home after a long-hard day's work and teaches his son how to ride his first bike, plant a garden with the other son; teaching him how to care for things, I see the man who fixes, remodels and renovates anything at my request. The father who loves me and our daughter through our many MOOD SWINGS! The father who never complains about getting up in the morning and going to work whether it's rain or shine, snow or sleet. A father who loves without conditions.
When we are born into this world and put on this earth, we are not given a say of who are parents and family will be. But we are giving the same opportunity...to come to know our HEAVENLY FATHER, through His son Jesus Christ. And with this opportunity there is; love, peace, joy, happiness, guidance to get through hard times, strength to endure any pain, and hope to get pass the disappointments. Whether your natural father is living or has passed away...reconcile! If you have discouraged instead of encouraged your husband...reconcile! If you have turned your back on God...reconcile! It was when I FIRST began to reconcile things with the Lord that He reconcile everything else in my life. I want to encourage you today and remind myself, though life may have not started the way we would have liked, it can still be lived and end with the ways of the Lord. Take a step today, ask the Lord to come into your heart and life and reconcile! Then take another step and forgive your natural father (maybe call Him or write a letter if he is deceased) and take an even bigger step and let our Lord and Savior be a father to you!!!
Remember, surrender all...
Tynisha
So beautifully written! Thanks for sharing!
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