God's Timing Part 3: "For I know the plans..."

When I grab those moments to really reflect on all that the Lord has done and given me, I am brought to my knees every time to a prostrate position of humbleness and gratitude.  Long before I decided to walk with the Lord, He was there; being a father, providing for me and keeping me safe in His arms.  When I made the decision to not be a victim of life, I learned how to take responsibility, not for the things that others did to me, but for my reaction to those things.  I didn't always know how to do that, but I was determine to not let life have its way with me, but rather me have my way with life; enjoying it, experiencing it and living in it (and not dead to it).  The Lord has given me so much, not just tangible and financial blessings, those things can become temporary. What He has done and what He has given, no human-being or job can give. The one opportunity that He provides is far better than any other opportunity that I have had...the opportunity for a better life.  With that opportunity, He picked up the broken pieces of my life (even the little sheddings) and put it back together to.  He completed the incomplete pages of the chapters in my life.  And He redirect the road map in my life to give me a destination.  So what does this mean???

Well, for me, it means a life separated, dedicated and consecrated to the Lord.  You see, as this process of restoration, reconciling and wholeness took place, the Lord would show me glimpses here and there of what was buried underneath it all.  Gifts, talents and abilities that would come to the surface occasionally but never given the opportunity to maximize their potential.  The Lord would put nuggets of opportunity in my lap for the sole purpose of stewardship, gratitude and commitment.  I needed to learn how to be a good steward over everything, big or small.  To nurture and care for the smallest task and be faithful over that, to qualify me for the bigger assignment. I learned how to be thankful for the blessings that didn't come in monetary form, but had a much bigger impact.  And most of all, I learned that everything that was given, was not for me, but for the Lord and the ministry of His Kingdom.

My new heart wasn't just so I would no longer live in a state of bitterness and I was no longer numb, it was so that I can love unconditionally and without borders, trusting that He was with me every step of the way.  My new heart was given so I can hear the cry of the youth, see of the need of the single-mom, encourage the discouraged wife and have compassion for others.  My new heart is helping me to develop a lifestyle of forgiveness and patience. I am forever learning how to humble myself when I have erred.  I was given a smile, not to enhance my outer appearance, but to welcome and acknowledge someone who has convinced their self that there is no good people left in the world.  I have been given a laugh that carries the tone of freedom. A sense of humor that helps to lighten the load of a heavy situation. My feet have been redirected to move about with purpose and determination.  And my golden-token of humility keeps me at a place of vulnerability, surrenderance and captive to the Lord.

All of this fits into the plans that the Lord has for my life.  I remember a time when I was at the altar and my pastor shared with me, that if I would lay down my life and dreams for what the Lord wants, He would raise me up to do great things for Him, Proverbs 19:21.  I remember telling myself, "I can't, I can't believe for something this big!" I was scared and confused.  I was still in the "getting know the Lord'' stages.  And I have to be honest, at that time, I didn't fully understand and trust.  It was safe for me just to not sin anymore and treat others right.  But to no longer desire things and go after those things, my faith was not there.  You see, when I looked at my timeline and added up my equation, I was given a positive results.  And when I looked at the Lord, all I saw was a lost.  But, little did I know, it took for there to be a loss to have great gain...My equation didn't require me to loose my life, dreams and aspirations.  In my book, things were adding up...so I thought.  I would hear the scripture Jeremiah 29:11 over and over and as encouraging as it was, I still thought my plans were better. Not because I figured something out that God could not (yeah right) but, because I felt like I was in control. I was laying out the plans and drawing up the blue-prints. I knew what my results were.  But you see, when you get to the place where you  recognize and understand that God's thoughts are not our thoughts and His ways are not your ways Isaiah 55:8&9; you realize that you have been cheating yourself all along.  My plans didn't have legacy attached to them.  They weren't structured with vision and purpose. And the results were temporary.  When I gave over full access to the Lord in my life...WOW!  I not only found out that I had value, but I found out the worth of my value.  I found out that my gifts, talents and abilities belong to the Lord and surrendering them over to Him would afford me life-changing results.  My time alone with Him built my faith and encouraged me.  And because He has been a father to me, when He spoke to my pastor and confirmed my identity and purpose, the next chapter in my life would be a page-turner!

The Lord has called me into full-time ministry.  A Kingdom-wide ministry attached to a church with international vision and influence.  I am not a pastor's wife, nor profess to be a minister of the gospel.  But, what I am, is a willing servant who laid down her life to take up the one that the Lord has for me.  For years I struggled with not knowing who I was and what I was put on this earth to do. I searched under every rock, listen to the perception of others and cut my losses on more than 1 occasion to find my identity...still nothing. I made choices that will have a life-long affect.  I have stumbled, I have failed and I have given up when things were too much to carry. Now, I will tell you, in my plans or the plans of any other person, these things would be unacceptable.  But in the plans of the Lord, those things qualified me...To God be the Glory!!! I enter this new season of my life as a woman, mother and wife who has overcome and has been hand-picked by the Lord to do a great work for Him.  And you know what?, my dreams and aspirations of encouraging multitudes, influencing lives and empowering others, are all a part of HIS plans for my life.  This blog, was a part of His plans for my life and through it and my transparency, He has used it to minister and give hope to so many.  I didn't need to be this big and famous house-hold name, this Woman of God who hosts conferences around the world.  I just simply needed to be willing to die to self.  This call to ministry is coming at a time in my life that I can fulfill it.  This would haven't have been possible for me 3 years ago and I can see how now, why my deliverance and restoration was so needed.  I am walking in this new season excited and confident in the Lord to carry out the assignment He has given me. 

As I close this series of God's timing, I want to encourage and remind you that God's timing is perfect. If He is working things out in your life...HE IS RIGHT ON TIME.  If He is reconciling your hurts...HE IS RIGHT ON TIME.  If your family is being put back together and He is restoring your marriage...HE IS RIGHT ON TIME.  If you are in a season of redemption from addictions, behaviors and habitual sin...HE IS RIGHT ON TIME.  If your road map of life has failed you and you now need to be redirected...HE IS RIGHT ON TIME.  The hardest thing for me to do, was to lay down my life and all the plans, dreams and aspirations that came with it.  During the process I could feel the growing pains, experience the purging and endure the change.  I won't present this picture of easy to you, because it's not.  It wasn't easy for me to trust what was being said and go with it. It wasn't easy for me to believe for something that I could not see.  But what was easy for me, was the Lord's assurance that His yoke is easy and His burden is light, Matthew 11:30.  The Lord never promised that we won't endure hard times, but He did promise that He would always be with us.  It doesn't matter how old you are or where you are in life, God has a plan for you.  When I look back at things, what I was trying to hold on to wasn't much at all.  It only fed into my pride and gave me false hope of me being in control of things.  Maybe your like me and the thought of laying down your life is scary and feels unbearable. But from one woman, mother, wife, and friend to another; I am a living testimony of God's redeeming power.  I want to encourage you today, take the lost and gain more.

Remember, surrender all...
Tynisha